The Pancha Kleshas all revealed in one morning.
OK there is not such a thing as the suffering of one's being in a waiting list. Have you ever really wonder about the nature of a waiting list?
Normally when we are on a waiting list, is for something that we desire to have or to be , but for various reasons is not available at the time. Next stage comes an acceptance of this fact and right after comes the feeling of suffering. How does this happening ?
So you need to be patient, but the fact that your minds says to you to be patient it turns the coin from the other side and give rise to your impatient and anxiety..and you suffer because the present moment it disappears.
No Santosha [ Contentment ] as the life comes.
The last 5 months i'm exactly in that position, as i am waiting for a new chapter in my life to begin, but how ignorant am i that i let myself trapped in this waiting list...
it comes one morning that the inner light is a little bit stronger and helps you to have a glimpse of what is really taking place. Right here, right now.
And like this i saw clear the 5 causes of my suffering
Avidya [ ignorance ]
All these days of waiting i forget my inner quest " who am i ? " - By applying this quest every moment, reminds me that im trying to investigate the Self, and the Self can only be beyond of what i'm identified with.
Asmita [ egoism ]
Because of my ignorance i pushed away all of my beloved ones, as i though that my kind of suffering is the greatest and no one can understand. And how selfish is that? - To drop the expectations of my ' Uncertain I ' maybe will let me unhooked of my Ego.
Raga [ attachment ]
Because of this selfishness, i attached more to what was making me feel stronger. Meaning my practices, but in that way that i cling too much on them and lost the feeling of spaciousness within the limits, the limits become my barriers and eventually my cause of last weeks injury. - To Let go of my self-center response to reality, right here, right now.
Dvesa [ aversion ]
Because of my attachment, i get disappointed of myself because did not coming to the way i wanted and eventually trapped in a meaningless fighting with myself. - To cultivate new patterns in my mind and body and get rid of the old ones, maybe is a way out there.
Abhinivesah [ the fear of death ]
Because of all the 4 previous facts, i cannot set me free. I fear more of coming to the state of Yoga. And that is a small death i let happen to me day by day.
- To embrace the realm of uncertainty and allow myself to be all right of what i don't know how is gonna be..is the freedom (?)
AVIDYASMITA RAGA DVESABHINIVESAH KLESAH
[ Ignorance, egoism, attachement, aversion, and fear of death are the five obstacles in life ]
Patanjali's yoga sutras
Patanjali's yoga sutras
Dedicate this post to Cibin, from Kerala